If I were granted the power and authority to kill whomever I chose, (street justice, if you will) then the asshole who decided it would be a good idea to remove the dead bugs from his windshield while traveling 70 mph on the freeway with me behind him would be first on my list to die today. Fucking douchebag. Could it not have waited? Who doesn't understand the laws of physics whereby something the weight of a grain of rice projected almost vertically is going to spray the bejeesus out of my windshield when faced with a horizontal force at least 1,000 times its weight?? Every time this happens to me I really wish I had heat seeking missiles in my Nissan Sentra. But, seeing as I couldn't even get a car with power windows, I don't think the "launch missile" feature will be available for upgrade any time soon.
Next on my death list is Katy Perry, because if I have to hear the opening lines, "You....change your mind...like a girl....changes clothes" one more time when flipping through the stations, I'm going to kill a puppy.
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